“ Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears. ”
What was best for me I didn’t want. Although I knew logically that protecting myself and choosing happiness was the best option, it was the long term choice of best fit. In the short term, protecting myself was to stay where I was and happiness was with him. But he did not fit me and I did not fit him and maybe we did at one moment, but those moments fade. The strong ones stay and the real effort comes through both parties, not just one and they mirror each other — it’s not a constant blood draw from one heart to another. So I lied to myself until I could lie no longer; that the fear of not having happiness and love condemned me to a fraudulent love and in this, there is no happiness.